So basically, I have came up with 1000+ words so far. Not much but it's got the basis of the story in it. I want to share it and get feedback before working on it some more because I haven't a clue what I could put into it in the world of Limbo. Here it is :
NOTE : I know it's not that great I used to do decent work but it's been a while since writing something.
Limbo
I’m sat in my beloved mansion alone. My feet up on a rest by the crackling fire giving off a warm sensation and filling the room with noise quietly pouncing around. Sadly it is the only noise I get now since my wife passed away, Ninety years of age and I am still alive, which I believe is an incredible feat for my expectations. The rest of the house is unoccupied which I felt bad for because I shouldn’t be living here when I only make use of the kitchen, bathroom, library, living room and my own bedroom. The house has an eerie atmosphere because it’s old and deserted; the only ones to keep me company on occasion through the week are the cleaners who I pay to keep such a place clean Even then they’re focused on work because it isn’t easy cleaning a twenty-two room mansion.
For the most part I can make do with this as I still have my family members to talk to when they visit me every year at least so all is not bad. As my life is slowly coming to its end my body is not like it used to be, Now it’s the time again, my grandson and granddaughter came to visit me again to see how sacred old me is doing. To see their glowing personalities from both of them brings a smile to my face.“Grandpa, you’re ninety years old now and have had more experiences than us but you have never told us about them. Could you please tell us one?” they said sat on the grand royal sofa which certainly needs to be replaced as it has lived with me for 15 years now.
“Sure. I guess it is fair I should tell you about my past life with my wife as you have told me about yours and things that have happened. “I said willingly, It has been a while since I have been able to tell anyone a story from my past...
I was out in the park with the love of my life enjoying our relationship all going well, I was the luckiest man alive I thought. No one could take the smile away from my face when she was around me, on this warm summer’s day. “Do you want to go out and get an ice cream? It’s pretty hot today.” I said to her. The brown, silky hair gracefully danced as the soft breeze weaved in and out through the locks of hair as she turned to face me, “Sure, don’t worry I will pay for us, you always buy for me.”, smiling she grabbed my hand and walked me over to the joyful tune of the Ice cream van.
As we made it there the chilling breeze from the freezers brushed against my skin giving me some relaxation against the heat. I enjoyed it for the brief few seconds but it seemed to hide back into the depths of the ice cream van. “What do you want?” she asked me while looking at the menu composed of many different types of ice creams made.
“I’ll have a normal vanilla.” I didn’t feel like rummaging through each and every flavour to choose something I may dislike so why not choose the one that started the ice cream craze off? The scent was unreal like a mountain of sweets with various toppings to be put on the ice creams trying to smother me.
After paying we walked over to a nearby bench and sat together, Sights of children playing could be seen and noises being created by each of them expressing happiness and various emotions. The ice cream she chose was mint chocolate, her favourite. But we always nearly end up sharing regardless of what we pick out of kindness. We were an average couple, happy not to worry about bad events occurring.
Everything’s great: a beautiful carefree girl who will try lightening up the mood of any sad moment. Who could wish for anything more?
However, I took it all for granted. We were ready to go home and the weather started to worsen, a cold unforgiving gust set upon the park and rain clouds covered us up like a blanket. It started to patter gently with rain quickening its pace during every second, growing heavier and faster. We rushed a long towards the car park but it was still a fair distance from where we were stationed currently. Everyone seemed to have evacuated from this before it even happened as we were the only ones having to face the devious, sinister weather.
And then it happened, something beyond comprehension to any possible life form.
As the rain got heavier, the mist began to set and crackling of clouds could be heard. I truly thought death was staring me in the face.What could you do? My wife clasped my arm frightened, I could really do anything to help her as I felt I was being choked by the downpour and mist.
But as we began to move, the crackling clouds finally madetheir judgement and struck a nearby tree which splintered and snapped as if itwas a twig. It collapsed on me crushing my head and upper torso. I truly believed I died as everything went black and I had no sense of hearing.Darkness shrouded around and I soon woke up, in the same place. Something was different though, the world seemed to have lost all emotion and colour inside.
I wasn’t underneath the tree for some reason, I felt lighter and breathing was difficult for the first minute. After regaining my breath and recovering from the shock I look down, to see my body. Did I die? It looked like it. “Hello is anyone there?!” I shouted in utter confusion, the fear I felt was unreal and no one was there. Taking a second glance I realise, my wife isn’t there at all.
The world seemed to be in an everlasting twilight and no one was around, only me and god knows what. So I began to wonder around. Everywhere had some kind of scare to it and all the structures that looked like buildings give off a sinister figure. No animals, nothing.
“Hello?” called a worried voice, happiness developed because someone was there but also panicking because I don’t know who or what it is.Slowly I walked to the source of the sound, observing my surroundings trying to mark out places in case I was to get lost.
A door blocked me off from reaching the sound, surprisingly it wouldn’t open even with force, and I didn’t know what to do but wonder looking for something. Is this death or is it a dream within my unconscious mind? Only time will tell but as the thought even entered my brain, the world began to blur and flash in a wild flurry. Suddenly I found myself watching a memory of my childhood, one that I didn’t fancy seeing, Bullying. Several kids surrounding the child with a great look of fear, he was defenseless and I couldn’t help anything. I watched until the very end in depression as how I did nothing back then and I could have changed that. But sadly that’s the past.
Oh and sorry, for some reason it didn't paragraph and I am quite to change it.
EDIT : I might just add a file because this message hates me and won't make it copy paste right.
NOTE : I know it's not that great I used to do decent work but it's been a while since writing something.
Limbo
I’m sat in my beloved mansion alone. My feet up on a rest by the crackling fire giving off a warm sensation and filling the room with noise quietly pouncing around. Sadly it is the only noise I get now since my wife passed away, Ninety years of age and I am still alive, which I believe is an incredible feat for my expectations. The rest of the house is unoccupied which I felt bad for because I shouldn’t be living here when I only make use of the kitchen, bathroom, library, living room and my own bedroom. The house has an eerie atmosphere because it’s old and deserted; the only ones to keep me company on occasion through the week are the cleaners who I pay to keep such a place clean Even then they’re focused on work because it isn’t easy cleaning a twenty-two room mansion.
For the most part I can make do with this as I still have my family members to talk to when they visit me every year at least so all is not bad. As my life is slowly coming to its end my body is not like it used to be, Now it’s the time again, my grandson and granddaughter came to visit me again to see how sacred old me is doing. To see their glowing personalities from both of them brings a smile to my face.“Grandpa, you’re ninety years old now and have had more experiences than us but you have never told us about them. Could you please tell us one?” they said sat on the grand royal sofa which certainly needs to be replaced as it has lived with me for 15 years now.
“Sure. I guess it is fair I should tell you about my past life with my wife as you have told me about yours and things that have happened. “I said willingly, It has been a while since I have been able to tell anyone a story from my past...
I was out in the park with the love of my life enjoying our relationship all going well, I was the luckiest man alive I thought. No one could take the smile away from my face when she was around me, on this warm summer’s day. “Do you want to go out and get an ice cream? It’s pretty hot today.” I said to her. The brown, silky hair gracefully danced as the soft breeze weaved in and out through the locks of hair as she turned to face me, “Sure, don’t worry I will pay for us, you always buy for me.”, smiling she grabbed my hand and walked me over to the joyful tune of the Ice cream van.
As we made it there the chilling breeze from the freezers brushed against my skin giving me some relaxation against the heat. I enjoyed it for the brief few seconds but it seemed to hide back into the depths of the ice cream van. “What do you want?” she asked me while looking at the menu composed of many different types of ice creams made.
“I’ll have a normal vanilla.” I didn’t feel like rummaging through each and every flavour to choose something I may dislike so why not choose the one that started the ice cream craze off? The scent was unreal like a mountain of sweets with various toppings to be put on the ice creams trying to smother me.
After paying we walked over to a nearby bench and sat together, Sights of children playing could be seen and noises being created by each of them expressing happiness and various emotions. The ice cream she chose was mint chocolate, her favourite. But we always nearly end up sharing regardless of what we pick out of kindness. We were an average couple, happy not to worry about bad events occurring.
Everything’s great: a beautiful carefree girl who will try lightening up the mood of any sad moment. Who could wish for anything more?
However, I took it all for granted. We were ready to go home and the weather started to worsen, a cold unforgiving gust set upon the park and rain clouds covered us up like a blanket. It started to patter gently with rain quickening its pace during every second, growing heavier and faster. We rushed a long towards the car park but it was still a fair distance from where we were stationed currently. Everyone seemed to have evacuated from this before it even happened as we were the only ones having to face the devious, sinister weather.
And then it happened, something beyond comprehension to any possible life form.
As the rain got heavier, the mist began to set and crackling of clouds could be heard. I truly thought death was staring me in the face.What could you do? My wife clasped my arm frightened, I could really do anything to help her as I felt I was being choked by the downpour and mist.
But as we began to move, the crackling clouds finally madetheir judgement and struck a nearby tree which splintered and snapped as if itwas a twig. It collapsed on me crushing my head and upper torso. I truly believed I died as everything went black and I had no sense of hearing.Darkness shrouded around and I soon woke up, in the same place. Something was different though, the world seemed to have lost all emotion and colour inside.
I wasn’t underneath the tree for some reason, I felt lighter and breathing was difficult for the first minute. After regaining my breath and recovering from the shock I look down, to see my body. Did I die? It looked like it. “Hello is anyone there?!” I shouted in utter confusion, the fear I felt was unreal and no one was there. Taking a second glance I realise, my wife isn’t there at all.
The world seemed to be in an everlasting twilight and no one was around, only me and god knows what. So I began to wonder around. Everywhere had some kind of scare to it and all the structures that looked like buildings give off a sinister figure. No animals, nothing.
“Hello?” called a worried voice, happiness developed because someone was there but also panicking because I don’t know who or what it is.Slowly I walked to the source of the sound, observing my surroundings trying to mark out places in case I was to get lost.
A door blocked me off from reaching the sound, surprisingly it wouldn’t open even with force, and I didn’t know what to do but wonder looking for something. Is this death or is it a dream within my unconscious mind? Only time will tell but as the thought even entered my brain, the world began to blur and flash in a wild flurry. Suddenly I found myself watching a memory of my childhood, one that I didn’t fancy seeing, Bullying. Several kids surrounding the child with a great look of fear, he was defenseless and I couldn’t help anything. I watched until the very end in depression as how I did nothing back then and I could have changed that. But sadly that’s the past.
Oh and sorry, for some reason it didn't paragraph and I am quite to change it.
EDIT : I might just add a file because this message hates me and won't make it copy paste right.
