Well, this weekend made it official. I am stuck in the "Friend Zone."

Okay, so I have liked this one girl for 4 years now. And I have been friends with her for three years. And I always kinda figured that I was in the friend zone, but I always kinda desired that one day I could escape that.

But an incident this weekend kinda just showed me that that will never ever happen.
I went up to a camp in the hills 5 hours away from my house with my youthgroup for three days.

Well for starters, I became friends with this girl three years ago, when my friend(who knew I had a crush on her)started talking to her and told her he liked her at the same exact camp.
And since I was his friend, and they hung out the whole weekend, I hung out with them for those 3 days. And since then we became good friends.

But yesterday I was hanging out with friends up near the football field of the camp. She snuck up behind me and hiptossed me into the snow...Yes. I am man enough to admit it.
We laughed and she helped me up. So me, her and my 2 friends all started talking. My two friends left us leaving me and her.
She then started asking me about my friend(who originally told her he liked her), and I told her he was going to a different school and stuff.

She says that she remembers how he used to like her and how it creeped her out. Because she didn't find him all that attractive, nor really like him. But she said that she regretted him telling her how she felt because she felt that it really ruined their friendship since everything was awkward when they were together.

But it was at that moment, that I just knew I could never tell her how I really feel about her. So as you all can guess, Creedance Clear Water Revival once again was the only band on my Ipod I have listened to for the past two straight days.

I also realized how far I was in the friend zone when one of the most talked things between us is how much she likes another one of the kids in my group, who is also another friend of mine.
She even at one point while standing ni the lunch line turned and told me with her hands clamped together and a huge smile on her face "I know I can tell you this because you won't get mad. But Colin is SOOO cuuuute!!"
I just laughed and told her I didn't feel the same way about him.

Even though inside I was breaking.

So yeah, for the past 36 hours I have been in a kinda depressed slum.


SORRY for the long wall.

Ouch man. I know how you feel. This year has been the first year that I've started really having good friendships with girls, but that's also a bad thing right now because I have a friend who I really like, I just don't want to ruin that friendship with her by making a move. I feel for you bud.

Also, this is the only girl I have ever honestly talked to.
I mean she knows more personal things about me then my closest friends. Like she is the only friend I have ever talked about my dick head father I haven't seen since I was 3 months old. I don't even talk or mention my father to my frends who have known me for years.

Amongst other things. This is the only girl I have ever really felt close to(kay, the ONLY girl I have felt close to, much less talked too).
So I really don't want to do anything to ruin this friendship, despite right now that I feel like crying.

Yea, that's exactly the situation I'm in right now. I've talked to this girl about things I've only told one other person, who i consider to be my closest friend I've ever had, so we have a good friendship. I hate being stuck in that spot where you are worried that making any moves will just ruin the friendship.

NO. She does not think I am gay.....>_>

Nah, she doesn't really. But she does talk about her past boyfriends and such and the things they would do to her. Like how her last one told her she needs to wear makeup cause she doesn't look good without it.

But she knows I am not gay.

Well, if ya wanna say something, well say it.

I'm sure it's a whole lot harder than it sounds, but if ya wanna tell her, tell her. If ya don't, well, don't. Either way, if she really is a friend, she'll appreciate your honesty.

Hell man, you know her better than we do, so you do what you think is best for both of you.

Well sorry to hear that. My advice is go with your gut instinct and don't tell her you have feelings for her. In fact I recommend you misdirect her. Show interest in other chicks (even if you don't really care), ask her about them, maybe her friends etc...

This keeps your friendship and she may start to see you in a different light.
Maybe you'll never be more than friends with her, but a huge positive to that is that it's much easier to meet and break the ice with girls when they see you're with one.

I don't know. I have never really been interested in girls.
OR LIKING AND ASKING A GIRL OUT.
I AM ATTRACTED TO GIRLS. SERIOUS.


But honestly. As far as I can remember, I have only really liked 3, MAYBE 4 girls. Were I actually REALLY liked them. But I have never had the balls to actually talk to any of them. And out of them all, she is the only one I have ever been close friends with.

I have always had the mentallity that the right girl will come to me, and that I shouldn;t worry to much about looking.
So unlike most of my friends, I have never had a girlfriend.

So I honestly don't think that I am going to say anything to her.

2 REASONS.

1, im a fucking pussy.

2). I would rather not lose or ruin the friendship we have.

It fucking hurts like hell, but thats growing up.

All I know is that CCR is what I am falling asleep to tonight.

Toughy...

Either try misdirecting her so that maybe she sees you in a different light, or just come out with the truth and face the consequences.

You never know, maybe she feels the same but is too scared to tell you for the same reasons you are.

I like metal's idea comment on other girls.

"Wow look at the tits on that one"

she'll say

"Oh and what about mine?"

you'll say

"They're nice but i'd like to try them out"

she'll say

"Anything you want big man"

-cracks fingers- Yeah i've been thinking about writing porn.

I now have a hard-on...

*goes to bathroom where gf is taking a shower*

You never know, maybe she feels the same but is too scared to tell you for the same reasons you are.

I feel the odds of this are slim. I may be wrong, but It's very possible she had that talk with you because she's afraid you'll declare feelings for her and ruin the friendship.

So I honestly don't think that I am going to say anything to her.

Good, because you shouldn't.

I have always had the mentallity that the right girl will come to me

This is like hoping you win the lottery, but you never actually buy a lottery ticket. Could happen, but the odds are stacked against you.

I wasn't saying in my post that you need to start scoring chicks today (better get dressed!). I'm saying start showing interest in other girls to her. You + girlfriend might not compute for her. You need to change that mindset so that she can consider you + her.

Fake it till you make it...
See what I'm saying?

Metal, I need to try dat
I am the friend zone magnet usually, but oh well..
Soap do expect to go getting a girlfriend early on anyway o.o I don't expect to and it's probably a lot better having a girlfriend who is more mature about things and has grown out of the high school phase.

I haven't had a girlfriend and i probably wont till I am 19 or 20 just becuz.

Thats rough soap. I like Metal's thinking on this subject (funny he and I think a lot alike when it comes to women) and show some intrest in some of her friends. I hate to say it but jealousy changes womens minds about everything and if she has any intrest in you as something other than a friend you might see it there.

Otherwise just tell her. It's risky, but if you really feel that way, then there is no reason to torture yourself by holding this in.

Either way I really hope it works out for the best man.

if you have a great friendship then it is not worth the risk.

i absolutely fell totally in love with this girl when we were both in year 11. had a great summer holiday together and at the end of it it all fell apart when i told her how i felt.

but now we are still best friends and tbh i wouldnt want to fuck the relationship up (we're basically siblings now) with anything more than what it is at the moment.

You could always inadvertently ask her out to see her reaction as a test.

The ol' double april fool's joke.

"Wanna go out?"
"Uh.... no?"
"April fools! I wouldn't date you youre like my sister!"
"Ok cool, I wouldn't want to have cease all contact with you"
"O_O haha yeah. That would be. weird. >_>"

OR

"Wanna go out"
"Jump in my pants already you"
"Booya"

or you could be around an aunt and be all best friends with her, then ahead of time have your aunt/uncle ask if you're dating and maybe judge her reaction to that.

if the time is right maybe do a pretend-ironic arm move.

if your watching a movie with her, yawn and put your arm around her neck. but make it really obvious you're doing it.

then laugh about it if you have to bail.

The ol' double april fool's joke.

"Wanna go out?"
"Uh.... no?"
"April fools! I wouldn't date you youre like my sister!"
"Ok cool, I wouldn't want to have cease all contact with you"
"O_O haha yeah. That would be. weird. >_>"

if the time is right maybe do a pretend-ironic arm move.

if your watching a movie with her, yawn and put your arm around her neck. but make it really obvious you're doing it.

then laugh about it if you have to bail.

Strike these from your playbook guys.

Never, ever do this unless:
1. The girl is in kindergarten (and even then she'll probably see through it)
2. You really want to be painfully humiliated.

but its so funny!

even better on guys XD

Metalzoic wrote:

The ol' double april fool's joke.

"Wanna go out?"
"Uh.... no?"
"April fools! I wouldn't date you youre like my sister!"
"Ok cool, I wouldn't want to have cease all contact with you"
"O_O haha yeah. That would be. weird. >_>"

if the time is right maybe do a pretend-ironic arm move.

if your watching a movie with her, yawn and put your arm around her neck. but make it really obvious you're doing it.

then laugh about it if you have to bail.

Strike these from your playbook guys.

Never, ever do this unless:
1. The girl is in kindergarten (and even then she'll probably see through it)
2. You really want to be painfully humiliated.

Well for the most part, this.
BUT easy teenage girls will fall for anything.
Not really applicable in Lobo's case I'm guessing, but I thought I'd put it out there.

Yeah, I am too much of a wimp to really even try anything.

Maybe when I graduate HS, and get my truck. Then maybe start things off with "Hey wanna hang out this Friday?" or stuff like that. Then slowly move on from there.

Gotta have confidence man.

'Sides. If you or her are going off to college next year, I mean you really don't have a whole lot of time to build a romantic relationship.

Could I ask why it would ruin your friendship if she turns you down? I mean if she rejects you why would she not want to be friends?





(disregard my questions if what I am asking is just stupid)

if you pretend you were joking around or something it sounds mean to the girl and if she finds out then she might feel bad. Plus it might hurt her feelings if you said you were joking and made her look like an idiot.


@Tom
Because sometimes you can't face them again because you're embarrassed or she might feel you will still try to get to be her Boyfriend or something. I can't explain it well.

Boxxy wrote:if you pretend you were joking around or something it sounds mean to the girl and if she finds out then she might feel bad. Plus it might hurt her feelings if you said you were joking and made her look like an idiot.


@Tom
Because sometimes you can't face them again because you're embarrassed or she might feel you will still try to get to be her Boyfriend or something. I can't explain it well.

it sounds like they have a very close friendship though. If something like casually asking her out makes her not want to be friends it sounds like she did not value their friendship very much. (Again I could be WAY off base)

A romantic relationship is immensley different. Being rejected can cause awkwardness, embarrassment and much more. These are real risks even in adulthood. Alot of women would be flattered, but it wont matter if your regular friendship now.becomes awkward. Personally ive never been with a girl I was friends woth.before.

Yeah Tom, it's a LOT more complicated than just that.

Or maybe you could do this... someday while youre talking about other girls or guys, or whatever, hint that you used to like her

"yeahhhh, you know, i had a crush on you a year or two back.."

and then just see where things go from there.

maybe bad idea, worth a try?

Frostbyrn wrote:Or you could be really mean to her and stuff that way she will know you have a crush on her

That only works in elementary school >.>

Frostbyrn wrote:Or you could be really mean to her and stuff that way she will know you have a crush on her

i think thats only true up until youre about 8 years old.

t-800 wrote:Could I ask why it would ruin your friendship if she turns you down? I mean if she rejects you why would she not want to be friends?





(disregard my questions if what I am asking is just stupid)

Cause in the back of her mind she'll be thinking about what he really wants

Ducksaws wrote:

t-800 wrote:Could I ask why it would ruin your friendship if she turns you down? I mean if she rejects you why would she not want to be friends?





(disregard my questions if what I am asking is just stupid)

Cause in the back of her mind she'll be thinking about what he really wants

Oranges?

or tacos...

we're talking about soap here, not the girl!

Ducksaws wrote:

t-800 wrote:Could I ask why it would ruin your friendship if she turns you down? I mean if she rejects you why would she not want to be friends?





(disregard my questions if what I am asking is just stupid)

Cause in the back of her mind she'll be thinking about what he really wants

some chocolate milk?

Shit actually, I'd want a Pear. A nice juicy Pear...

*Drools*

NO, ALL HE WANTS IS TACOS.

Has no one actually said melons yet?

Son I am disappoint.

Zillah wrote:NO, ALL HE WANTS IS TACOS.

nah he wants tacos and fries.

Liquid N02 wrote:Has no one actually said melons yet?

Son I am disappoint.

i c wat u did thar.

http://static.funnyjunk.com/gifs/57c281c0_41b2_ac9f.gif